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The National Tidy Town’s Award Results sponsored by SuperValue were announced today and from a County Tipperary and Thurles Town point of view, these results make very interesting reading indeed.
First allow me to congratulate Killarney in winning this year’s award for the Tidiest Town in Ireland and also scooping the first prize for Ireland’s Tidiest Large Town. Out of a possible total mark of 400, Killarney gained another 3 marks above last years score of 307, winning with an overall total of 310 marks.
While it is not my personal view you understand, many Tipperary people point out that with Killarney’s God given natural scenery and the endless amount of Tourism and other public Development funding, which floods into this area on a weekly basis, it is most surprising that they do not win every year.
 Liberty Square Thurles Tipperary Ah, but pay no heed to that kind of talk, it’s all just jealousy and sure Kerry people will understand these unkind remarks. You see, unlike Tipperary, Kerry have the ability to select political representation who have real proven ability, and who actually appear for work in Dail Eireann every day, thus succeeding in ‘Bringing home the bacon,’ on a weekly basis.
Our congratulations must also go to Lismore in Co Waterford, this years winners of the Tidiest Small Town Award.
County Tipperary Tidy Towns Results
In Category A, The Bronze Medal Awards with a prize fund of €400 goes to Tipperary’s former winners Birdhill, with 306 marks and to Terryglass, with a well deserved 299 marks. Terryglass is also Highly Commended.
Also Highly Commended is Clonmel in South Tipperary with a whopping 298 marks. Now here I find myself in somewhat of a quandary, because this same year, yes 2011, IBAL (Irish Business Against Litter) branded this fair town as”Littered,” no not “Moderately Littered,” or a “Litter Blackspot,” just plain old “Littered.” Obviously one of these independent judges, and mind you I am not saying which, needs to visit a well known, tried and trusted dispensing optician.
Also deservedly Commended this year is the village of the Silvermines with 290 marks and Kilsheelan with their 293 marks.
Endeavour Awards, plus 5 crisp €100 notes apiece, goes to the Tipperary towns of Capparoe (223 marks) and not surprisingly Cashel (285 marks).
Again congratulations to the hard working Emly Tidy Towns Committee, here in Co. Tipperary who won the Sustainable Development Award and the Regional REPAK Award, latter with prize funding of €2,000.
Cloughjordan Tidy-Towns Committee, are also in the winning enclosure, taking the Climate Change Award and it’s prize fund, again of €1,000.
In Category E, Thurles was the only town in county Tipperary that did not bother to take part in this years Tidy Towns Competition. Rumor has it, (Only a rumor mind you, nothing confirmed as yet.) that the paper work got accidentally placed in the wrong envelope by our Local Town Councillors, so now you know why Queen Elizabeth II didn’t get her invitation on time, to visit her native town earlier this year, she was sent the Tidy Towns application form in error.
Ah, sure not to worry, these little accidents do happen, t’was an honest mistake and sure it happens to me self all the time, especially when I go to paying my utility bills. As the wife said last week, in the harshest possible descriptive adjectives available in the English vernacular, “You” said she in a loud voice, “Are idiotic, incompetent, ineffectual, bungling and totally unfit to be in charge.” That was me of course she is was referring too and not Thurles Town Councillors, you understand.
Heavens forbid that me missus should insult any of those fine body of men and women, who work so tirelessly, on a daily basis, giving leadership, while carrying out the wishes of their future electorate.
Seriously, isn’t Transport Minister, Leo Varadkar really fast off the mark, or “On the Ball,” as we say in Thurles.
Fair dues Leo, you took full advantage of the fact that our three TD’s, not to mention our powerless Local and County Councillors were frolicking, armed with their sand buckets and spades, on the beach, when you ordered the National Roads Authority (NRA) to stop work on all major new road projects, because of spending cutbacks. (Click here to view Independent newspaper report.)
As one leading Politician said to me “You take your eye of the mark for five minutes and that Leo is in wielding the ould spending cutback axe. Faith it would not have happened, only I was trying to activate my Dail fob key at the time, when he struck.”
 Fine Gael Sponsors New Thurles Tourism Postcards Of the 45 road projects being shelved, 32 of these are national primary and 13 are national secondary, with projects shelved to include Clonmel and Thurles bypasses. Does this mean that there will be huge redundancies among members of the NRA board?
Against a background of graffiti, forgotten overflowing litter bins (Attached to pole 0904.), daily traffic chaos and failed EU funded festivals, Thurles bypass is now to be shelved, after 10 years of failed political promises. Thurles.Info are unable to confirm if the €880,000 bicycle tourism corridor, planned from Limerick to Nenagh and recently lauded by Labour TD Alan Kelly, (His personal contribution to job creation.) has also been cancelled. I hope not since, one Bed and Breakfast reports that they had seven cyclists, stay over night last year. (The idiots had been reading their iPhones upside down and headed east instead of west.)
Here is hoping that the early medieval bridge built by the Norman Butlers in the 12th century can continue to take the traffic strain. True for the Tourism Brochure ‘Lonely Planet Ireland,’ I quote: “Thurles ( Durlas) is a large market town 22km north of Cashel, which was founded by the Butlers in the 13th. Century. Little of note has been built there since and the town square is little more than an ugly car park.”
Based on current plans, no new roads project will be commenced in 2012, 2013 or 2014, so I hope those bridge building Normans were better at future planning, than our currently holidaying TDs.
In a poll taken by this Website in June 2011, only 3% of those who voted, actually believed County Council Officials and Politicians, who claimed that the Thurles bypass would be open by Christmas. This Poll at least gives me some hope for the future of Tipperary.
In the meantime the Fine Gael Party have issued new Tourism Postcards for Thurles, (See Above) funded by Leader Grants . The cards entitled “Don’t You Wish You Were Somewhere Else.” will go on sale shortly, in case any tourists should accidentally stray in this general direction and get trapped in traffic.
 Tipperary travelling a slippery road. Some TDs, claiming to represent the people of Tipperary and who signed in at Leinster House for expenses worth up to €38,000 a year, failed to take part in a significant number of Dail votes. Fine Gael’s Tom Hayes is one of quite a number of elected Tipperary public representatives identified by the Independant today, of claiming expenses by fobbing in, but yet not turning up for Dail votes.
Tom has been absent for ten votes, but is still behind the main offenders, namely TV celebrity Michael Healy Rae, and keen bog environmentalist Luke ‘Ming’ Flanagan, both of whom have the poorest voting records since elected.
According to the same newspaper Casino promoter, Mr Michael Lowry TD, only voted 3 times, out of a possible 24 and missed 7 of these votes while clocked in. He was just plain absent from Leinster House on the other voting days. Michael Lowry was also one of the biggest recipients of the “Party Leaders’ allowances,” since its conception in 2005, with payments of almost €250,000 according to Departmental figures obtained under freedom of information legislation by the Irish Times, and which has cost Irish taxpayers, nationally, in total, more than €4.6 million. This allowance, paid on top of salary and other allowances and expenses, is understandably tax-free and recipients do not have to account for how the money is spent. Nationally twenty-six Oireachtas members are now entitled to this allowance, well up on the ten who were claiming it last year, due to the success of so many Party defecting Independents, in last February’s general election.
Now do you understand why Cabinet Ministers should be placed above ordinary citizens and as such, be allowed to leave Dublin’s traffic jams and use emergency bus lanes, they just cannot get to work.
In the light of this leadership shown by our politicians, it is not totally surprising then that John Hennessy, the Regional Director of operations in HSE West reveals this week that the Mid Western Hospital in Limerick, attempting to serve the population of North Tipperary, has a staff average absenteeism rate problem. Low staff morale is sited as probably a key factor, but certainly not pay and conditions. This absenteeism rate stands at 7.3% among the 703 nursing staff and 11.5% in the hospital’s 211 other care staff, hence the corridor trolley service currently on offer.
Meanwhile according to that English newspaper the Irish Daily Mail, (You surely remember the newspaper that campaigned for the reintroduction of the HPV Cervical Cancer vaccine in Ireland, while their London edition were printing stories attacking the same vaccine.) state that cash-strapped Montrose bosses in RTE are to fork out €10 million to implement 75 redundancies, while TV licence payers are invited to gain entertainment by watching washed-up celebrates clean horse manure from racing stables. I can’t wait to get home and switch on.
What all 3 papers failed to note, however, is the regular attendance nowadays by two TD’s at every possible public vote catching event. The recent invitation, to persons involved in promoting the Arts, by Minister Jimmy Deenihan, who was visiting Ballina/Killaloe, Co.Tipperary, last Thursday, saw Alan Kelly enter the Lakeside Hotel arm in arm with Jimmy. Despite RSVP to the Arts Office in North Tipperary County Council, Jimmy had no time to discuss the neglect of Thurles and surrounding towns and villages, so the Hidden Tipperary Group were ‘fobbed off,’ onto his Press Officer, Therese O’Connor. Jimmy it turns out was in a hurry to join Transport, Tourism and Sport Minister Leo Varadkar to announce a €7 million investment for that little known tourist area in Ireland known to the few as Killarney, Co Kerry.
For those of you who think I am being a bit cynical check this out. Click Here and ask yourself the following questions:-
Where is the Thurles GAA museum?
Where is the Thurles Source Theatre?
Where is Thurles Famine Museum?
Since when did Tipperary Institute become a Museum or indeed an Art Gallery?
Who is supporting the funding and administration of this Joomla, Open Source Content Management System, website?
While our local Politicians, Urban and County Councillors and other gold chain wearing Community Leaders continue to practise a policy of party politics and personal gain, before and above fiscal rectitude or fair play, County Tipperary continues to be lead along and down a very slippery road, with the worst yet to materialise.
As you can see from the image attached, here in Tipperary we are beginning to erect public warning signs.
 Cannibals A group of Cannibals were recently hired by a large Banking Corporation, as part of the Irish Government’s new National Internship Scheme, JobBridge.
“You are all part of our team now,” said the Human Relations representative, during a welcoming briefing.
“You will all get the same benefits as the rest of our full time employees, for example €5 a mile for motoring expenses, one hour on Friday to check if your bank account received your wages and productivity bonuses, and you can go to the Staff Cafeteria for something to eat, but please, please don’t eat any of our present employees.”
The Cannibals swore a solemn vow to behave and control their natural instincts.
Four weeks later their boss called a meeting and remarked, “Men you’re all working very hard and I’m very satisfied with your performance, however, it has come to my attention that one of our Secretaries seems to have disappeared yesterday. Would, by any chance, any of you know what might have happened to her?”
The Cannibals all shook their heads in unison, indicating they had no knowledge of the Secretaries whereabouts.
After their boss had left, the leader of the Cannibals turned to the others, “OK, which one of you idiots ate the secretary?”
A hand was raised, hesitantly, by one Cannibal. Their leader became even more angry and yelled, “You fool! For four weeks now we’ve been eating Managers and no one noticed anything, then you had to go and draw attention to our activities.”
The late Mattie Ryan would have been very proud indeed. But no doubt he was watching down with a smile as the Gucci Handbags got dusted down, hairs got super glued, false nails were coloured and highlighted (Or was it the other way around, Can’t remember), and new frocks got their first official outing. Tail feathers were plucked from every exotic bird found holidaying in the Thurles area, only to be used later to decorate many of the unusually shaped hats, displayed in abundance.
The ‘glam’ preparations, which I describe, of course were for yesterday’s right Royal Mock Wedding event, held in aid of a most worthy cause, the Thurles Cancer Support Group, Suir Haven, latter a charity once very close to Mattie Ryan’s heart.
The bride for this right ‘Royal Bash,’ was the very lovely Princess Sharon Kerrigan, the groom, the equally handsome Prince Brendan O’Donnell.
Escorted down the aisle by Deputy Michael Lowry TD, the bride looked breathtaking in a brushed silk white bridal evening gown, with delicately laced bodice.
The couple both publicly declared their love for each other in front of a large gathering of family and close friends in that ‘Basilica of Rock Music,’ locally known as HQ Nightclub here in Thurles, presided over by Tipp FM ‘s Breakfast Bowl impersario and the radio stations resident parish priest Rev.Fr. Aidan Mac MC.
A video recording of the ceremony was undertaken by top videographer, Mr Garry Butler and the newly married couple later joined their guests for a large amount of light refreshments, in a pub crawl which included Michael Bowes Pub Friar Street, The Arch Bar, Millay’s Tavern and of course the home of the GAA, Hayes Hotel all located in Liberty Square, just to name a few.
The happy couple were tight lipped on information regarding their honeymoon destination, but to Sharon and Brendan go the good wishes of all their families members and many friends here in Thurles, for a happy, healthy and prosperous life together. (Personally, I just can’t see the marriage lasting.)
Nevertheless a most enjoyable event in aid of a worthy cause, and to all involved well done.
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