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It would appear that Thurles residents spent most of the pre-Christmas period staring heavenwards. Since there were no public reports of a large bright star moving across the heavens, having suddenly appeared in the east; we must assume that their gaze was understandably drawn to our superb display of overhead Christmas lighting.
However, this heavenly distraction may have led to a failure to notice the deplorable and totally unacceptable state of our street surfaces here in Thurles, over this busy festive period.
Note: Tarmac Does Not Attach Itself Successfully To Plastic.
Last week some of our local councillors rushed to their Facebook pages, as they are wont to do, to upload details of their extreme municipal district powers; recording personal achievements regarding the improvements made to the surface of Barry’s Bridge. Alas, imagine their disappointment when for the 4th time in just 28 days, 16-wheeler trucks, required to pass through our narrow streets, have turned all such improvements to the state of mere gravel.
A couple of questions now need answers.
(1) Would you find road surfaces akin to that found presently in Thurles; around Leinster House, Kildare St, Dublin?
(2) Would you find road surfaces akin to that found presently in Thurles, in any street in Dublin city?
(3) Is this all part of Fáilte Ireland’s attempt to attract tourism; as in “Ireland’s Ancient East.” ?
(4) In a county where elected Councillors voted to increase Local Property Tax (LPT) by 10%, why do we tolerate this neglect?
We have been informed that 13 million Euro has been allocated for works on National Primary and Secondary roads in 2018; up from 2.16 million Euro this year. Among the schemes to benefit will be the N24 through Tipperary Town including Davitt Street, where 1.5 million Euro will be spent along with works on Main Street and Fr. Matthew Street. The N74 through Golden is also earmarked for works costing over €350,000 and works will continue on the N62 at Lismackin, Roscrea.
A further 4 million is allocated for an overlay of the N24 bypass in Clonmel, while sections of both the N24 and N74 in Carrick on Suir will also benefit, together with 2.5 million Euro earmarked for the N52 in Borrisokane.
There is no mention of the Thurles bypass, initially promised some 16 year ago; so here is hoping that the early medieval Barry’s bridge, can continue to take the strain of modern heavy duty vehicles.
Co. Tipperary Christmas shoppers can avail of limited free car parking in all towns car parks presently controlled by Tipperary County Council, during December 2017.
Limited seasonal parking has been agreed as follows:-
The towns of Thurles: Roscrea: Templemore: Shoppers can avail of free car parking in County Council car parks during December ending on Saturday, December 23rd.
Nenagh: County Council car parks are free from Saturday, December 16th, to Wednesday, December 27th, inclusive. Note: Railway station car park continues to be free for the foreseeable future.
The towns of Cashel: Tipperary Town: Cahir: Free parking on Saturdays in all County Council car parks until and including December 31st.
Clonmel: Free parking on every Saturday in December in Abbey Street, Mary Street, Gordon Place, Mick Delahunty Square, Kickham Street, Upper Irishtown, Lower Irishtown, Quay Street, Suirside, and the County Council car park situated on Suir Island.
Note: Rules regarding ‘On-street Parking Fees’ will continue to apply, throughout the festive season.
“The rotation of earth really makes my day.” (Think about this quote. Get It? OK continue on anyway.)
Captain’s Log, Star-date December 6th 2017:-
Tourism Ireland’s senior delegates, envoys and ambassadors, today were described as being somewhat deflated, having launched a failed stratospheric advertising campaign to highlight Sceilg Mhichíl, latter a rapidly decaying rocky outcrop, west of the Iveragh Peninsula in County Kerry, and which played a small role in the latest Star Wars saga, ‘The Last Jedi’.
The Force Awakens
Tourism Ireland’s billboard rose skyward just 33km (20.5 miles) above planet Earth, launched with the help of a weather balloon, while a similar Thurles billboard jetted to an amazing altitude of some 435 km (just over 270 miles) propelled by means of reboost manoeuvres, using a Briggs & Stratton rocket boosted lawn mower engine, one day previous.
 One of the many images captured during the launched Thurles Stratospheric Advertising Campaign, as it headed for the “Dark Side”. One “Black Hole” was located during the campaign, found in a black sock, worn by a launchpad crew member.
A spokesperson for the Templemore – Thurles Municipal District stated that Tourism Ireland’s attempt to be the first to advertise in space had failed miserably, firstly; since it was launched the day after the Thurles space departure, and secondly; no single human or alien had actually viewed the image on the billboard, while it remained in space. This project therefore must be perceived as the greatest waste of taxpayers money (to use the words of Rowan Atkinson in Black Adder) since, “Olaf the Hairy, King of all the Vikings, ordered 80,000 battle helmets with the horns on the inside”.
The Thurles launch however had been viewed, as it flew past, by the crew of Expedition 53, all arsing around on board the International Space Station (ISS). Expedition 53, made up namely by Mr Joe Acaba, Mr Alexander Misurkin, Mr Mark Vande Hei, Mr Sergey Ryanzansky and Mr Paolo Nespoli, were all ordered by Commander Randy Bresnik, to scramble and man their laser weapons, fearing, understandably that they were about to be interfered with by an alien craft from outside our galaxy.
A grinning spokesperson for the Templemore – Thurles Municipal District stated, “The Thurles picture advert, which was launched skyward earlier, featured an image of the Christmas lights in Liberty Square, Thurles, Co Tipperary, and fully demonstrated the fullest commitment yet, that Tipperary Councillors and Politicians from all political parties were fully behind efforts to continue our growth in tourism in the area”. “Demands for access to visit Thurles have been unprecedented since the lights were switched on”, he continued.
The Thurles Stratospheric Advertising Campaign was launched from beside the Stone Man here in Liberty Square, in the town at 3.07 hrs GMT and returned from orbit safely, to exactly the same precise area, at 14.00 hrs; thus landing before our daily traffic-jam of parents had emerged to collect their offspring’s from schools and collages.
God help us and those who manage our public finances, if not “May The Force Be With Us”.
 The only occupant of a car has died following a car crash on the M7 motorway early this morning. The single vehicle incident, involving a female driver, believed to be in her 70’s, happened between Junction 24 (Toomevara / Nenagh) and Junction 23 (Moneygall) northbound, here in Co. Tipperary at around 7.00am.
Initial investigations indicate that the vehicle driven by the victim may have hit a barrier. A section of the motorway between both Junctions is expected to remains closed for several hours, to facilitate a Garda forensic collision investigation.
This latest Tipperary fatality brings to 8 in number, the people killed on Tipperary roads to date in 2017.
Witnesses are being asked to contact Nenagh Garda Station Tel: 067 50450; the Garda Confidential Line Tel: 1800-666-111 or indeed any Garda Station.
Go ndéana Dia trócaire ar a h-anam dílis.
The R498 road, linking Nenagh with Thurles, has been closed this morning between Ballinamona Cross south of Nenagh and Fantane, north of Borrisoleigh village.
The closure has been caused by an accidental fuel spill and the emergency services are currently dealing with the problem.
Motorists are being asked to take extreme care while driving in the area, and to follow diversion signs in place, thus avoiding the area.
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