Humour « Thurles Information

River Suir In Thurles Has To Wait For Funding Until At Least Next Year.

The year was 1878; the month was October, when a headline in “The Western Daily Press” newspaper (published in Bristol, England), stated, quote; “A Committee Should Consist of Three People, One of Whom Is Always Sick and the Other of Whom is Always Absent”.

The year was 2013, the month was November; when we at Thurles.Info first highlighted the state of the River Suir, particularly within the centre of Thurles. [VIEW HERE].
North Tipperary Co. Council officials, same recently retired, denied any such issue with the river, despite the photographic evidence provided.
Over the last, almost 11 years, all efforts put in place to correct these issues of decline within this area, were slowly dismantled by council officials. Where is the fountain, Councillors and their red faced officials refuse to answer?

Again, over the same almost 11 years, local press and local radio namely “The Tipperary Star”, and “Tipp Fm” radio refused to publish or to highlight issues regarding the River Suir. Both same media outlets choosing instead to publish other dubious and suspect press releases, same prepared by power seeking local councillors, their officials and our two local residing goverment politicians, intent on personal vote catching exercises and self glorification.

At least 4 times every year, over the past 11 years, Thurles.Info has written about the declining state of the River Suir, often forwarding same to highly paid officials in Tipperary Co. Council; e.g. Mr Joe Macgrath (Chief Executive) and Ms Sharon Scully (Thurles Administrator), but to no avail. Also almost every month we have published press releases from the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA), warning on the decline in our rivers and streams.

The current town administrator, Ms Sharon Scully, in an email dated January 18th 2022 stated, quote, (In relation to road signs facing in the wrong direction) “Resources can only be dedicated to this task when more urgent works such as housing repairs, burials, and roadworks allow”.
In the same email, Miss Scully also stated, quote, “I would like to see Thurles town promoted in a positive light – the good work that has been carried out, such as works on Liberty Square* and the River Suir Walkway, as well as funding that has been secured to redevelopment Thurles Market Quarter, and also deserve mention. When we highlight only the negatives, in a public forum, it misleads people as to all the town has to offer and paints the town of Thurles in a light that I’m sure neither you nor me want”.

* Liberty Square — With its double signposting only feet apart; its street lighting that burns night & day; signs pointing in the wrong direction; a confined traffic space that forbids a mother to open a car door to place a child into a rear car seat, and the aroma of raw sewage emerging every time temperatures reach 18° Celsius.

**Double Sign Posting just feet apart, Liberty Square Thurles.**
*Pic: G. Willoughby*.

* River Suir Walkway — Tarmacadamed, destroying existing biodiversity and which has already started to ravel.
* Thurles Market Quarter, — 3.4 million being to spent to build a second restaurant and a market quarter, both of which the public never asked for and which reduces car park spaces for existing struggling businesses.

On the following day Ms Scully stated also in a further email, quote,“I think it is very important that any town has strong community engagement, where issues that are of importance can be highlighted and discussed. However, when this is done in a public forum it can paint the town in a negative light, particularly when the positives are not also highlighted”.

Ms Scully ‘community engagement‘ in Thurles is only in token, and businesses and residents are not heard, in favour of poor planning and and what appears to be unqualified planning architects. So we should hide our towns deficiencies in the hope that consumers and non existant tourists won’t discuss their inability to find a parking space in a small rural town.

Note the dates November 2013 and January 2022. Now in September 2024, nothing has been done to solve the river Suir issues or the town drainage issues, as Mr Jackie Cahill TD, Mr Michael Lowry TD, Local Councillors and Thurles Municipal District Council officials drive their motor vehicles through a deserted Liberty Square, with windows tightly closed, to avoid the smell of raw sewage.

We are now informed, 11 years later, following a video posted on Thurles.Info, on August 17th last, VIEW HERE, that biologist Mr Fran Igoe, a spokesperson representing the Local Authority Waters Programme (LAWPRO) agrees that what is happening in Thurles and the river Suir is ‘shocking‘. Of course Mr Jackie Cahill TD was quick into the fray, ‘calling for action’, in an effort to protect the farming community, latter partially responsible for its demise..
Mr Igoe (lAWPRO) has stated that test results, now show that while one should expect to find a broad range of aquatic insects and bugs, he could only find two species in our river.

**Reed cutting began on the River Suir Thurles, today September 18th.** **Last time these reeds were cut was in March 2019**, **prior to the local elections**.
*Pic: G. Willoughby*.

Just two days after the Council meeting on Monday last; this morning, Wednesday 18th September, 2024, a group of men are to be found in the river strimming the reeds and removing last winters tree branches, same washed down from upstream. [You would swear RTE were coming to video the area, for Thursday’s “RTE Investigates” programme].

This latter happening came as a massive surprise, since we were informed by one local Councillor, that LAWPRO would be leading the process. They alone would be drawing up a plan of action which would involve input from all the relevant bodies within a 6 month time span to produce an agreed action plan. At that stage they would apply for funding to carry out all recommendations in this future completed report.

Funny thing, two days later, it appears that no consultation was required from the relevant bodies [e.g. Inland Fisheries, Biodiversity Ireland, Refresh Thurles, Birdwatch Ireland, Irish Environmental Network, Fauna & Flora International, National Parks & Wildlife and Uncle Tom Cobley and all.].

Could today’s action see Thurles now end up being prosecuted by some European environmental organisation? After all, in recent years, there has been a growing trend in people and organisations using Europe’s unparalleled system for protecting human rights in helping to tackle environmental problems.

Seriously, it should be noted that LAWPRO was set up in 2016 (Eight years ago) as a shared service on behalf of the 31 Local Authorities in Ireland. The Programme operates nationally out of 13 different Local Authority centres. LAWPRO is supposed to be driving public engagement, participation and consultation with communities and stakeholders at local level via its Communities Team; while delivering a programme of catchment assessment in priority areas for action via its Catchment Science Team and coordinating these activities across the relevant public sector via five Regional Operational Committees.
With this service set up in 2016, one must ask the question why does the river Suir in Thurles have to wait six months for an action plan, before seeking funding?

**Swans remain residents on the river Suir in Thurles**.
*Pic: G. Willoughby*

Just to correct our councillor, who claimed that no Swans remain in the river Suir and the ducks have left; this is totally untrue in both counts.
The two swans remaining in this, their home territory, have produced Cygnets each year. Once these Cygnets are old enough to look after themselves the parents cut their parental ties and chase them away, sometimes quite aggressively. The Cygnets normally join the first flock of teenage swans they encounter, where they usually hangout until they mature, at around 4 years of age and in turn locate a wife and then nature performs a full circle once again when they find their personal territory and raise a family.
In the wild, with all of the hazards they have to live with (vandals, pollution, mink, overhead cables, lead poisoning, fishing-tackle injuries, wind turbine generators etc), the average lifespan of a Swan is 12 years, while in a protected environment they can survive up to 30 years of age.

The waste and neglect at local authority level continues.

Irish Parliament’s 18 Space Bicycle Shed Cost Over €335,000.

Politics: From the words Poli (Meaning ‘Many’) and Tics (Meaning ‘Blood Sucking Parasites’).

A newly erected bicycle shed to house eighteen bikes at Leinster House, latter the seat of the Oireachtas, the parliament of Ireland has cost more than €335,000.
The above expenditure could have purchased a 4 bed, 3 bath, 138 m² detached house, or 3 semi-detached council houses each with 3 Bedrooms, and 1 Bath, here in urban Thurles, Co. Tipperary.

Initially hailed by Transport Minister Mr Eamon Ryan TD, as an excellent example of public sector climate action, this shelter, required archaeological advice, to make sure it fitted into the parliamentary complex, at a cost to the taxpayer of €2,952.

We are advised that over 600 civil service staff support the functioning of the Oireachtas in Leinster House. Add this number to the 160 TDs attending for 3 days each working week, [Note: 124 men and 36 women (latter only 22.5%)]; one hopes that this “18 Space Bicycle Shed” can be easily expanded.

Then again many may be working from home or using “The Dart” (“The Dort”, for the benefit of those commuting from Sandymount and Foxrock)“, or (God forbid) these rainy days, using other public transport.
One thing we do know, the vast majority of these 760 workers and their bosses are not arriving on bicycles, but then again we never get to see what is parked around the back of that formidable structure and are the great unwashed permitted to mix with nobility?

We further learn, courtesy of the Office of Public Works, that a high-quality structure was needed because of the building’s sensitive location.

Note: Off the record, and keep tight lipped on this, Thurles does not have even one Bus Shelter, and when Tipperary Co. Council learn of the above costs of an 18 Space Bicycle Shed, local commuters had better continue to carry their parasols and hope for non-windy conditions.

According to numerous press outlets, other breakdown costs; provided by the Office of Public Works, shows that €322,282 was spent on the main construction and finished installation; while €10,816 was paid for quantity surveying services and contract administration services.

However, asked for a copy of the business case for this project, the OPW confirmed that none had been required.
On a more positive note: unlike roofless Thurles Bicycle stalls on Liberty Square, Thurles, shown above, at least the 18 cyclists in Leinster House won’t have to ride home on wet saddles or come out to find someone has reversed into their “High Nelly” .

Looks like Tipperary Co. Council are not the only wasters of taxpayer funding.

River Suir Thurles In Unacceptable State – Continued.

The video which demonstrated the deplorable and completely unacceptable state of the first 50 metres of the river Suir south of Barry’s Bridge, in the very centre of our declining town of Thurles, was further supported by comments on social media. All comments indicated the disappointment felt by residents with regards to council officials and elected councillors and the degrading of Thurles.
Ms Sharon Scully (Thurles District Administrator) was, (as is usual with Thurles.Info), made aware of our dissatisfaction.

We will of course be forwarding an email to Ms Scully again later tonight, seeking further assistance with regards to the next 100 metres of this town’s valued river Suir.

Pic (1) Despite two days with no rain, evidence of ground water continuously flowing from under the Leisure Centre. Note the plastic papers ready to exit, come the next downpour to push open the heavy drain lid.
**Pic (2, 3, 4) *Supermarket Trolley’s which have remained in the River Suir for months*.**

What we would like is that Ms Scully would contact three of the local Supermarkets, latter backing unto the river Suir, asking that they remove their shopping trolleys from the water.

I know that Ms Scully will be anxious to observe this area herself, (after all seeing is believing), and so there are two other issues she might help us with, which are as follows:-

(1). Take a walk on now retired Mr S. Hanifin’s tarmac path from the ‘Swinging Gates’, on Emmet Street and examine the crater close to the now deceased Chestnut tree stump, same waiting for some pedestrian to fall into. (Yet another day out in Dirty Dublin, emerging for Tipperary Co. Council to visit the High Court, may still await.)

**Pic (*left*)** – Giant crater on riverside walk near Emmet Street *‘Swinging Gates’*.
Pic (*right*) – Some unknown liquid flowing into the river Suir from behind the future useless and yet unfunded *‘Thurles Inner Relief Road’*.

(2). What is flowing into the river Suir from a drain at the area where the inner relief road will be built. (Look, it’s possible that it was someone just brushing their teeth). Sure you know the area that I am talking about, didn’t TD Mr Jackie Cahill get the money from government to buy and update this area way back in 2021, or was he joking. [See video HERE quickly, before someone teaches him how to remove it.]

Work To Re-design Thurles Now Moves To Robert Emmet Street.

Thurles.Info’s ‘Eye in the Sky’, swooped down to take a closer look this morning at the most recent re-designing of streets in Thurles.
Robert Emmet Street (often spelt ‘Emmett‘ situated immediately to the rear of Tesco) has been the scene of the latest attempts by a motorised vehicle to change the Thurles landscape.

**Badly damaged *‘Watery Mall’* Famine Wall**.
*Pic: G. Willoughby*.

This time the object of someone’s attention was the Great Famine 1847 stone river wall. This wall in recent years; during the Spring and Summer seasons, has successfully hidden the noxious weeds, the dumped plastic wrappers, the tin cans and the glass and plastic bottles.

**Biodiversity sign hidden by supposedly biodiversity during** **the** ***‘No Mow*** **`May`** *Ever’* season.
*Pic: G. Willoughby*.

I hasten to mention that this same wall has also hidden the inability of town officials to undertake the cutting of the grass and noxious weeds, which in turn grants cover to water rats, allowing them to frolic freely of an evening; and all in the name of biodiversity which of course includes every bacterium that makes up our natural world.

Does Thurles still needs a Ring Road before 2040 I ask?

A Double-Intendre.

A double entendre is a figure of speech that is open to two interpretations; a way of wording a double meaning; one of which is obvious and the other which conveys a message that could be regarded as socially unacceptable or indeed, to some people, as being offensive, were it to be stated directly.

The late great British actor and comedian Kenneth Williams (1926-1988) must surely have been the best exponent of this art, through his many radio broadcasts (Round the Horne), and films (the “Carry On” series), which still today give us all much laughter.

The Ballad of the Woggler’s Moulie.

Vocals: British actor and comedian the late Kenneth Williams (1926-1988)

The Ballad of the Woggler’s Moulie.

Joe he was a young cordwangler,
Monging greebles he did go,
And he loved a bogler’s daughter,
By the name of Chiswick Flo.
Vain she was and like a grusset,
Though her ganderparts were fine,
But she sneered at his cordwangle,
As it hung upon the line.

So he stole a woggler’s moulie,
For to make a wedding ring,
But the Bow Street Runners caught him,
And the Judge said you will swing.
Oh they hung him by the postern,
Nailed his moulie to the fence,
For to warn all young cordwanglers,
That it was a grave offence.

There’s a moral to this story,
Though your cordwangle be poor,
Keep your hands off others moulies,
For it is against the law.

END.