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Tragedy Strikes Thurles Golfer

A long standing, competitive member of Thurles Golf Club was involved in a serious car crash some 12 months ago and was rushed by ambulance to University Hospital Limerick.

Just before being put under anaesthetic, his surgeon (as surgeons do), popped in to see him prior to his necessary and impending surgical procedure.

“I have some good news and some bad news,” says the surgeon. “The bad news is that I have to totally remove your right arm!”

“Oh God no!” cries the golfer. “My golfing is over! Please Doc, what’s the good news?”

“Well, the good news is” said the surgeon, “I have an available fresh doner part to replace it with; however it’s a woman’s arm and I will need your express permission before going ahead with any future transplant.”

“Do your best doc,” says the golfer, “I don’t care, as long as I can play golf again.”

The operation went well and one year later the golfer was again out chasing that little white ball at Thurles Golf Club.  Out also one morning just happened to be his surgeon.

“Hi, how’s that new arm?” asks the surgeon.

“Just great,” says the golfer. “I’m playing the best golf ever. My new arm has a much finer touch, and my putting has improved immensely.”

“That’s great, I’m so delighted” said the surgeon.

“Not only that,” continued the golfer, “but my handwriting has improved, I’ve learned how to sew and knit and I’ve even taken up painting early morning landscapes in watercolour.”

“Truly unbelievable!” said the surgeon, “I’m so glad to hear the transplant was such a great success. However are you experiencing any side effects at all?”

“Well, just two minor side effects”, said the golfer, “I have trouble parallel parking, and every time I get a sexual urge, I also seem to develop a feckin headache.”

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