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TD’s Sign Up To Lansdowne Rd Agreement

dail_chamber1Following a meeting of Cabinet in Leinster House, it has been decided that new first time elected members of Dáil Éireann will sign up to the Lansdowne Road Agreement, under the provisions of the Financial Emergency Measures in the Public Interest (FEMPI) acts, necessarily introduced in 2009 and imposed on public servants.

In a public statement issued by Cabinet on Thursday last, the government stated that it did not wish to be seen by the general public as acting unfairly in any future dealings, in particular with Secondary School Teachers, who share less holiday time, and the drastically reduced membership of An Garda Síochána, latter who put their lives on the line protecting Irish TD’s from death threats for a mere €23,500 per annum. Readers will be aware for the most part that both these said groups are refusing to participate in this aforementioned agreement.

To this end, as and from July 1st 2016 some 52 new Teachtaí Dála (TD’s) elected to the Lower House of the Oireachtas (Irish Parliament – Dáil Éireann), for the first time, following the General Election held on February 26th last, will now be subjected to a considerable reductions in both pay and expenses.

New first time elected TD’s will now only receive approximately €46,000 in salary during the life time of this present government, instead of their €87,258 salary as is the present case. The perk of granting new mobile phones; purchased to the maximum cost of €750 in any 18-month period, and previously allowed to all new TD’s; has also been removed.

In relation to mileage expenses, those residing 15.5 miles from Dáil Éireann will also no longer receive the customary untaxed €25,295 extra for turning up to work on their average of 3 days or less each week, regardless.

A full list of all Parliamentary Standard Allowances (PSA’s) will be published on the Houses of the Oireachtas Website later this coming week, with similar reductions expected to affect Seanad Éireann, latter the Upper House of the Oireachtas .

Water Conservation
Meanwhile the Minister for the Environment is understood to be looking into the possibility of running an educational campaign to encourage water conservation in the home.

According to the Irish Environmental Protection Agency, flushing toilets accounts for around 25% of Irish people’s waters usage, with a standard toilet using 1.8 gallons of water or more per flush.

The Minister is now suggesting that people should take their first pee of the day, while taking their morning shower. Such practise would see around 0.880 gallons of water only leave your shower head in the 22 seconds it takes for a human being to finish peeing; unless you possibly have been ‘on the p..s’ the night previously. Regardless this practise, if encouraged in every home, would lead to considerably less water wastage than used with a standard toilet flush.

Good news also for those of you who insist on wiping after peeing in the toilet; a huge saving can also be made in the weekly purchase of toilet rolls. With an average of 400 squares of paper currently found on most toilet rolls, peeing in the shower would in fact eradicate the wastage of up to 5 squares per roll on any standard wipe.

The Health Service Executive (HSE), are also supporting this initiative, based on the proven fact that hard-working household servants in Victorian times steeped their feet in urine, to ensure relaxed, soft, flexible foot skin.

Meanwhile strong opposition is expected to these proposed regulations from Irish Supermarkets and the manufactures of foot care products, including foot orthotics and insoles; both claiming hundreds of jobs will be lost to industry if these new rules come into force.

OK – If you believe the above, you would believe anything. However the solution given to those tired, callused and toughened areas of skin on your feet is absolutely true. Try steeping your feet in your urine for 15 minutes every night and after a week note the massive difference to your ‘trotters’.

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