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Irish Government On Summer Recess

It was most peculiar the Cabinet were meeting for the last time before the ‘Summer 2012 Recess.’

I can remember that talks on proposals for the reform of local government were not discussed at the meeting, despite much media speculation that the number of town councils, like Thurles, were about to be cut from 75 to 50.

There was no mention either of the .30 cent mystery price increase, imposed on tobacco products, earlier this month. However outrageous health warnings presently printed on tobacco product packaging was announced as continuing, thus demonstrating a caring and concerned HSE and Government.

Talking of a caring Government, also discussed was the placing of pictures of obese humans on all ‘Burger Joint’ packaging, as was the need to place images of the victims of drunk driving on Whiskey, Gin, Vodka, Wine and Beer bottles / containers.

But these discussions, including a motion to place the images of known, serving, dishonest politicians on annual tax returns, were ruled as unnecessary by the large majority of Government Ministers present, as was images of tortured animals on women’s hair & other cosmetic products.

Cabinet also discussed preparations for the Children’s Rights Referendum, which it intends to hold in the autumn, but could make no real decision on a suitable date, since presently the HSE admit that children remain totally unprotected, despite government claims to the contrary.

It was however agreed that the Revenue Commissioners were to be given the responsibility of collecting Phil Hogan’s new property tax, which is to be introduced next year. Later a Government spokesperson said this decision was being taken because Phil Hogan had failed miserably, in his badly thought-out efforts, to collect the previous €100 household charge & therefore could not be trusted.

Minister for Transport, Tourism and Sport Leo Varadkar said that some capital spending will have to be now deferred and CIE non-core assets sold to fund their €36m bailout for Dublin.  Well really, I remember thinking, sure we have no buses in Thurles and anyway such a bailout was not necessary. All Leo has to do is put one staff member working in railway stations like Monasterevin, from whence presently you can travel to Thurles for free, saving €22.20, that is if you should depart from there. It has no ticket office, no ticket machine and no personnel employed after around 6.00pm. So passenger, embarking from here, have a 90% chance of “seeing old Ireland free,” to use the well known republican quote. By the way if you are infirmed in any way, please note; last out locks the lift at this named station, so you must take to the stairs.

It was the screeching of drunken teenagers outside my window, returning from the local Disco, which woke me from this my sweaty, nightmare slumbers.  Thank God for that, the dream was so real; the Dail chamber was so real; even the politicians seemed real.

I can tell you now folks, without any fear of contradiction, that’s the last time I’ll eat Aldi’s mouldy old Irish Blue cheese, before I go to bed.

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